HAPPY OLD YEAR

2012 Was a whirlwind of both the good and the bad
But this time it was different ,

I'm not disappointed in me
Because this year there were no promises made ,
No revolutions set, no expectations i couldn't handle ,
I stayed true to me.
This year wasn't a totally awesome one
The world is still cruel
Happiness came and faded away
Love was and love lost
Friends came and left
But at the end of it all , I'm still alive
I May not deserve to be alive ..............................But im still here
Ive been bad , ....................................................But im still here
My thoughts and conscience haunt me daily
I'm constantly aggravated at the thoughts of what was or could have been

I've been the Golden child
I've been the black sheep
But the latter more than the former ,
Sometimes i wished i could just fade into the darkness but, the light always came crashing in
I choose words as my escape
I sang to penetrate rhythmic minds
And even though i hurt, the scars never show from the inside

But if i learnt anything this year , it would be you must always  'Know your worth "
But fuck it, its hard
Because there is constant pressure to expand this 'so called worth', or build it in a way that it would affect everybody around you  in their own way
This leaves me a melancholic
Still waiting for the day i get over this mind over matter bullshit
Till then am stuck in a bubble of my own

But its stays buzzing in my head "know your worth , know your worth"
Like everything else would fall into place after that
Still conflicted about a lot of this this year
But overall im still thankful , that i wasn't amongst the ones who could see it through ...........